I'm officially in Yellowstone!

I had a great time on my drive up with Mario through Utah. We stayed a few nights in Zion National Park and then continued up through Wyoming and stayed in the Tetons for a while with some friends and then up through Yellowstone, where I am at now!

Yellowstone is pretty cool. There's a TON of people and a ton of things to do (as long as you stay creative). My roommate is awesome and the friends I've made here are pretty cool, too. The meals and job here though could use some improvement...

Other than that, I'm just trying to go outside and enjoy where I'm at often and enjoy my summer!

Last night & This morning...Chicago.

A week until I leave for Chicago, and then after that is done...a week until I leave for Wyoming! Things are happening crazy fast. It is a little overwhelming, but I feel like it's coming together better now. I just hope that everything turns out well and that I have the strength to just go with the flow throughout my entire journey this summer. Aggghhhhhh!

...and everything feels the same.

Best friend is gone and I still have a month to burn before I get to run run run faaaaaar away from here! I mean, I still have a lot of good things going for me right now but I'm getting antsy now. I just uhh, have to find some money and then pray for everything to fall into place. PLEASE things, fall in place!

...please?

I had decided to dabble in new territory and it was going fine and dandy until it didn't. Because I'm not stupid, I could feel what's up. I could sense the change. But that's perfectly fine because I'm falling back into my path of what I wanted to do...which was explore and have fun and learn and live and be happy and free. To be wild and untamed and to be continue following my path of being a good person.

Disappointment isn't a word I will employ, neither is sadness. I have grown as a person to be beyond those words. Simply intrigued in how the mind works.

Now I am excited and joyful and filled with wonderment for the future.

FUTURE YOU START IN 40 DAYS! I cannot wait.

LOVE,

Christina

Hmmm...interesting. Iceland, you're very interesting! But I will say, Iceland, you're a little over the top...

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/mar/25/iceland-most-feminist-country

Speaking of Elliott Smith....
L.A. by Elliott Smith is one of my favorite songs...but the only one! Except for Baby Britain...and maybe one or two others. Shhhh!

I feel like this right now. blah! Don't let me become the next Elliot Smith, he's waaaaaay too depressing.


Dagger by Slowdive

I've had an abundance of thoughts lately. Thoughts that are just beyond my words to describe to the point that I am ready to give up on thoughts. Thoughts run a muck through my brain and bring back memories I've fought hard not to relive.

I just got out of the shower and I realized that I am actually scared to reminisce. Scared! Who'd a thunk that?! I am now acknowledging that I am in fact scared to remember because I am scared to relive the emotions and the bad thoughts I was having during those past points in my life. It's silly, but it's my reality. But I find my strength in knowing that I am scared of that, because I don't let it ruin my life. I just tell myself happy thoughts and work with and move beyond it. Because really, I don't think it does anything to forget or repress thoughts and emotions. It's better to acknowledge, accept and grow and move forward.

Anyways. I was taking my shower and I realized that I remembered my dream from last night!

I was going on a hike with my friend through the woods, which happened to have lots and lots of bears. I happen to be scared of bears. So walking, we looked ahead and saw a group of elementary school students out on a school trip. So we followed them. While following them though, a group of bears came up! I had constantly told myself that bears wouldn't approach big groups of people and that I would be fine and BAM! bears! So I had to walk through a flock of bears. And I lived. But then I started thinking of my knowledge I had  about the difference between black bears and brown bears and their personalities. (Black bears are more dangerous). So continuing walking, I became a leader for the little kids somehow and they were getting scared with all of the bears so I had to be brave. Then all of a sudden a bear came running at one of the students I was watching after and I had to jump in front of the student and make a loud noise and make myself big to get the bear to run away. So the bear went running and was gone for awhile when one came running back and this time it bit me! But I pushed it off and we continued because I wasn't hurt. I was even bit again by a different bear! And I was fine! We continued walking and I had to walk by a bunch of bears over and over again. Then we were done. The moral of the story? Bears aren't that scary, and even if something did happen, I would probably live. And bears can be many things and not just bears...

the. end.

hey life,

quit throwing shit in my face. thanks! 'preciate it.

yours truly,

C.

Last night.

"You're not 21," she says handing me my CA I.D. back to me.
"I'm not?" I say back to  her
"no."

"oh, well you might want to take another look because I wasn't born in 2007. That would make me...three?"

I have never been so angered so quickly. Having someone tell me that I am not 21 when I AM 21 pissed me off. It was a new feeling. The rest of the night the server was on tip toes..."I'm so sorry."

...damn straight.

On a happier note: My Stawberry blonde beer was quite good. :)

This morning I woke up and just knew it was raining. The sun didn't feel bright and the air felt sleepy, so I opened my door and sure enough the pitter patter of rain met my ears.

My dog had to go out though!
Our options? Long walk or dog park.

Next thing you know, we are hopping into my car and doing a drive by the dog park to see if anyone is there. I glance in the parking lot. It's like a ghost town. We keep driving. As soon as I pass the entrance to the park the barking begins and the whine that breaks my heart sounded loudly throughout the vehicle. He was devastated. I turned around and we pulled into the dog park entrance. It was just the two of us.

Now what do I do? Well, I pretend to be a dog! I start chasing and twirling and running and throwing balls and being crazy while the rain is pouring down on us and I can barely see through my eyelashes and I'm sopping wet. I run and I run and I run. And then finally after thirty minutes of playing by ourselves, someone else shows up. Then they run and run and run. And we run and run and run. Slowly a few more people came, but none of them stayed long. They couldn't handle the mud and the rain and slipping and sliding.

An hour and a half later me and my little amigo were ready to leave. My jeans, sweatshirt and running shoes were caked in mud. My hair was frizzing out the sides of my pony tail, rain drops making streams down my face and yet I had a smile plastered from side to side. I really enjoy getting disgustingly dirty. I look down at my little buddy. He has dirt all over his face and caked into his feet and his underbody is so low to the ground all of his little chest hairs are completely covered too. He's a few shades darker then when we had arrived and his quick pant and tongue hanging out his mouth tells me that he had a great time.

We looked at each other, got in my car (dirt and all) and went home.

We had had a great morning. 

The Soft Pack

This is my favorite song that The Soft Pack sings from the show I saw last Saturday. If they sound a little tired and out of it, I don't blame them! It was their TENTH show in one day.

Enjoy!


Answer to Yourself by The Soft Pack

You gotta answer to yourself

You can't depend on anyone else
You gotta know where you stand
And what's in your hands
Yeah you gotta answer to yourself

You gotta write down what you know
You gotta make sure that it's known
Because they're coming along to see what you've done
And they're gonna claim it for their own

You got a rabbit in your hat
You got a few tricks up your sleeve
Don't get stuck in a rut
Or stuck in the same
You got exactly what you need

You got a talent don't you know?
You're more talented than you know
And you give it a shot
And give it the time
And be surprised how far it goes

But I think I'm gonna die
Before I see my time
But I think I'm gonna die
Try it anyway

You gotta answer to yourself
2 days a week outside yourself
You take an hour a day, an hour a day
And you don't respond to anyone else

You got a few things on your shelf
You got to look through for yourself
You gotta choose what to read
Choose what to believe
And you don't take it from anyone else

But I think I'm gonna die
Before I see my time
But I think I'm gonna die
Try it anyway

The past week has been the most eventful in a while. I began school as a full-time student again AND I had my 21st birthday.

Translation?

I have been trying to get back into the studious mode while also going out basically anywhere I want now. It's funny how much power one card with a birthday on it can have.

Yesterday I found out about a band, from my friend, called The Soft Pack. I now believe I have a new band in the running for my full attention. Their music is SO fun and danceable and the lyrics actually are kind of refreshing too, which is always nice. Anyways, yesterday this band had TEN shows to celebrate their record release and new record deal with subpop. Their cd comes out on Feb 2.

All throughout the day SP was playing house parties and record shops and the very last show (the one I got to go to) was in a warehouse in Los Angeles. It was a dream come true and made me remember how much I love live music and people watching and just being shoved into a crowded room and being surrounded by noise in general. I really enjoy it. But I have no idea how SP played shows all day while drinking beer and whatever else and still made it to the last one at midnight. That was impressive. If I started MY day at 10am with beer and donuts I'd be past sick by midnight.

OH! and when we got to the warehouse a guy asked me and my friend if we were 21 and for the first time I got to say YES and not be lying. AND he believed us. Such a good feeling.

rainy days are fun days

People treat people who wear vests better than people who do not wear vests. Or at least, that is what I have noticed while wearing my vest. Which makes it a lot more enjoyable wearing a vest. I mean, not only am I keeping my core warm, decorating my mid section, but I am treated better as well! Um, may I get a heck yeah?

To vest wearers!

C.